Why the quick tips only take you that far.

Apr 12, 2023

Why stage fright isn´t handled with quick tips.

Maybe you have one or more negative experiences of speaking? Maybe you have been thinking about how you can overcome it? You see others thrive and use speaking as a career growth tool – and you want to do the same. But when your boss asks you to speak about the new project – you back off and let someone else do it. Even when asked, you find excuses. You self-sabotage – and that makes the problem even bigger and worse.

You probably already have turned to Youtube for tips on speaking. But they only take you that far. Tips like bring water to the stage, focus the audience, take a deep breath and the ”Just do it-tips” that seems so easy … and maybe isn’t?

In my experience overcoming stage fright needs a closer look into the reasons for it. For many of us, like me, it has risen from a lack in self-esteem, imposter syndrome or other self-confidence issues. And this issue does not go away with ”tips for taking the stage”. It needs to be addressed at that deeper level and to change negative self-talk into more healthy thoughts about ourselves. Easier said than done, isn’t it?

For me, the journey to become more self-confident has been going on for many years. Strangely enough, I have lived my professional life as a leadership trainer and facilitator for 30+ yrs! How fun and crazy is that? Someone suffering from low self-confidence and self -esteem- being ”on stage” more or less full-time. Well, I can see now how I was forced to upgrade myself to be able to succeed in this environment 😉

It set me off on a path of intense work on myself and lots of trial and error. I have learned so many lessons over the years, to say the least.

Anyway, there is also physical bodily reasons for fear to rise when we place ourselves in front of others like we do when giving a talk or presentation. It’s said to be on the list of the 10 most stressful things in life, together with loosing a loved one and moving homes 😉 So, lets just admit it- it is scary and it starts several stress reactions in the body!

Therefore it is important to keep stress-levels as low as possible to avoid the body going into full high-stress mode. That brings me to the third topic - which is planning & organizing!

I have learned so many aspects around planning a talk- some very practical like visiting the venue beforehand. Another important factor is to learn to be ”them-conscious instead of self-conscious”.

What I mean with that is to turn the focus to the listeners- what do they need, who are they, what is important in their perspective? To know this brings more clarity and confidence for you in the talk.

So, with this words I hope you can clarify what is your version of stage fright. Is it merely to handle the physical effects of standing in front of others speaking, or is it connected to self-confidence, imposter syndrome or lack of self-esteem? Or is it a planning issue where better planning skills will be your road to overcome it? Only you know of course.

Welcome to follow my work and to get in contact around my services.
With love, Mona

I am a Speaking Coach and have 30+ yrs of experience as a leadership trainer and facilitator. After working in business all this years I have now decided to take on personal clients that wants to overcome Speaking issues like stage fright, imposter syndrome or low self-confidence.